Thursday, August 27, 2015

To Hold You Over


I'm still here. I promise, blogging is still a big love for me. Life is just going very fast right now. 

I am 37 weeks pregnant with our little dude. If you haven't been following my pregnancy blog, I've been going to three or four doctor appointments per week. Even though little dude is healthy and growing well, I'm still considered a "high risk" pregnancy on paper because of Evelyn. I go to two non-stress tests a week, an O.B. appointment once a week, and I've had multiple ultrasounds mixed in as well. Needless to say it's taken up a lot of time. Throw in trying to soak up as much Squeaks time and attention as possible before she's no longer an only child, and I'm a very busy momma. 

It's still crazy surreal that I'm pregnant. Although I obviously have never experienced adoption from a birth mother's point of view, it's my understanding that a large fear for her would be an adoptive mother who doesn't love her adopted child as much as her biological child. This is a big reason a lot of birth mothers choose families without any biological children. They want their child to be put first. Again, this is all coming from things I've read/heard. Well, I'm here to say Squeaks' birth mom has nothing to worry about. Not only do I sometimes forget I didn't give birth to Squeaks, but I'm also slightly concerned my biological child can't come close to being as awesome as she is. As with all second time moms, I wonder how my heart can expand for another child. My blond/blue eyed self and my blond/blue eyed husband could never have created this cuddly, calm, chocolate-eyed, curly-headed brunette. That said, she is also the only child I can imagine having. She was so obviously meant for us. The idea of physically producing a child that will be biologically part of me feels foreign still. I'm not concerned about loving him AT ALL....it's just all very surreal. 

With my due date approaching and life being its ever busy self, I'll be taking a little blogging break. For memory sake I'll still be posting on my pregnancy blog, but some weeks I don't even get to that. When I return to Adoption Love, I'm planning some changes. As I mentioned before, I think a family blog will be more the theme instead of an adoption specific blog. After experiencing adoption and (soon to be) birth, "family" is on my heart and adoption does not define us. The future holds sibling bonding, family vacations, homeschooling, and beyond. Plus, I'm sure God has a few surprises for us too.

Until I return, here are some recent Squeaks pictures to hold you over. I know I'd go through withdrawals if I had to go too long without her, and so I will spare you all.

3 comments:

  1. Sounds great, happy to hear this update and totally understand your desire to morph your blog as your life journey continues to change and flow. I have done the same thing with mine and think it's only natural as our families grow. Thanks for sharing!

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  2. My mother-in-law has two children - one biological (my husband) and one adopted at birth. She has also said there is no difference in how much she loves them, and I have seen the proof of that lived out in their lives. I am so glad you get to experience both ways of receiving children into your life :)

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  3. Praying for you as you continue to grow your family! Hoping these next few weeks fly by, and I look forward to hearing all about how this lil' boy and his big sister continue blessing the socks off your family! xo

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