An Honest Gift Guide For Toddler Moms

It's that time of year again. The Christmas season is upon us and with it comes the endless stream of catalogs and gift guides. Everyone and their mother has a suggestion for how you should spend your money. "10 Items He'll Love!" "100 Educational Toys Your Kids Need!" "Gifts For Her That Will Melt Her Heart." And if you don't go bankrupt by December 31st you've failed and your family no longer loves you. Shhaaaaaame!

I'm over it. Have been, in fact. But my over-it-ness has been amplified by the stack of junk mail being filtered through my house these days. Toy catalogs two inches thick!?

So what have I done? Made my own gift guide in protest.

Here it is. The official (honest) gift guide for mothers of toddlers:

1. Time.

I want time. Time to just sit and stare at these awesome humans God has blessed me with. Time to slow down and listen to their twiddly little voices ask me a million questions, and the time to answer each and every one honestly and in-depth. Time to come completely unglued in a puddle of laughter with my husband when one of the kids says something hysterical. Time to cuddle each little person until I feel their bodies relax into heavy content sleep, and then time to just watch them breathe and feel their heart beating. 

2. Grace.

Show me grace. I am a super crappy friend these days. Have you texted me recently? I'll get back to you sometime next week. I promise. Expecting me to volunteer to help you with something? As long as it doesn't interfere with nap time, homeschool time, bath time, story time, snack time, helping my daughter wipe her own butt, changing a million diapers, the mountain of laundry, the mountain of dishes, or cooking three meals a day for five people....I'm in!...Oh crap, I forgot to feed the dogs.

3. Help.

But do it in a way that makes me feel like I'm still Super Mom, able to handle everything on my own, don't need help at all, because I've got this adulting thing down pat. Ya. Help me like that.

4. But really, help.

When you see I'm having a hard time controlling the urge to hide in my pantry and stuff my face, maybe offer to entertain the kids for an hour so I can sit and eat quietly. When I look a bit greasy or maybe smell a little, ahem, funky, feel free to point it out (because weird smells are my world) and offer to sit with the kids while I take care of business. Instead of wondering how often my kids eat Chick-Fil-A, offer to bring by dinner, or maybe pick up Chick-Fil-A for us. We're not picky (except for Josh. He's picky, but flexible.) 

5. Wisdom.

Give me wisdom to raise solid, godly humans. Give me wisdom to manage my time well so that the small people clawing at me don't drain me beyond my ability to function as a wife. Give me wisdom to parent with patience, consistency, and gentleness while still being an effective authority figure. Give me wisdom to seek God first in everything I do so that life doesn't distract me from what is truly important. 

6. Sleep.

No explanation needed. Just. Sleep.

7. Massage.

Because I am fully aware the rest of my list is nigh impossible unless you are God, go with #7. A massage would be great. And I won't complain because look at #3, I'm Super Mom. Plus, I genuinely love every minute of this exhausting, loud, chaotic, weird-smelly season of my life. Thank you God!

So Mamas, what's on your Christmas list?