A new home for Bear

Today was quite the journey. A day I have been anticipating for months but found out for sure was going to happen just last week. Today we drove two hours to Pyramid Lake and met Gingi's friend Bree to give her Evelyn's milk for baby Tessa. It was a happy-sad day. Nothing about today was wrong or bad. Everything about today was just as God intended it to be.

A furry friend came with us on our trip to the lake. This sweet stuffed bear was given to me as a comfort after Evelyn went home. A gift from the same good friend who helped connect me to Gingi by sending me her blog post asking for breast milk donations. It seemed appropriate that he should be passed on to Tessa with Evelyn's milk. He actually turned out to be a fun little distraction on the way.

On our way.

Bear started his journey at home with us. After watching us lovingly wrap the milk up and put it in a special ice chest purchased especially for this occasion along with some dry ice, we all climbed in the car. Then after a quick photo-op on the dashboard, he spent some time on my lap while I distracted myself with my iPad. Josh laughed at me from the driver's seat. iPad in one hand, iPhone resting on my lap with Bear, and mobile hotspot fired up and placed in the center console. Less than a year ago, I still had a cell phone that barely sent text messages. Now I'm a blogging, iPad toting, words-with-friends playing technology-holic. To commemorate this realization we YouTubed the ending scene from  Napoleon Dynamite where Kip confesses his equal but separate love for both

Comfort chocolate shake and Bear.

LaFawnduh and technology. For lunch we stopped at In-N-Out, a very appropriate last-day-in-California meal for Bear seeing as how Californians are the only ones blessed with this fast food miracle.  I ordered my usual cheeseburger and fries, and added a much needed comfort chocolate shake. Good stuff. Back on the road things were pretty clear and we made it to the lake faster than expected. Pyramid Lake is actually quite beautiful and I don't know that I would have ever known it existed if it weren't for this trip. It's easy to miss unless you get off the freeway at the right time. While we waited for Bree to arrive we enjoyed the visitor's center and a beautiful view from the balcony.  

Enjoying the view.

Things are a bit of a blur until we were back in the car on the way home. I remember Bree and her super cute kids being very sweet, placing our cooler of milk in the back of her car, and taking a quick picture with Bear to say goodbye. Later, back on the road Bree and I exchanged text messages of appreciation and I apologized for leaving slightly abruptly. It was either leave quickly or cry all over this woman I had just met. She didn't need to see that side of me just then. 

I missed Bear on the ride home, but Josh reminded me that both Bear and Evelyn's milk were going to a good home where they would be appreciated. I agree. I don't think we could have picked a better home for Bear and the milk. Soon Bear will have traveled farther across the US than I have. 

This was one of those difficult life events that you can see coming. They're rare. The majority of my difficult life events have been very sudden and unseen until they were right on top of me. This one was hard, and I've known it was going to be hard for awhile. Giving up something so precious and loved and wanted, because you know it is best and will be loved and appreciated by the recipient, is heart wrenching. My compassion for what our expectant mom will experience grows daily. I have peace though. And now I also have new friends and a special place in my heart for sweet baby Tessa all the way in Florida.

Bye bye Bear. Enjoy your new home.

Sweet Tessa and her "Evelyn bear".